In the Hands of God

In an amazing opportunity provided a couple weeks ago by God, I was among a small group of people who got to have dinner with Francis Chan when he was in town to give a conference talk. (I thought this blog was in need of some star power, so hang on while I bend over to pick up that name I just dropped.) It was funny how the group of us who were going to dine with him got worked up, practicing the things we were NOT going to say, and also getting out of our system to starry-eyed, groupie routine. I'm pretty sure this is the same process Francis' (yes, I can call him that) wife and kids go through every night before he returns home.

All the preparation was unnecessary, because as I'm sure you'd expect, Francis Chan is a pretty cool, casual guy to hang out with. In no way does he seem to give off an attitude of self-importance. In fact, as we wanted to talk about his next project, church life, etc., he kept trying to drive the conversation toward the basketball playoffs. Just ordinary guys stuff. Too bad we didn't have tickets.

The reason I bring up Francis Chan (other than the gratuitous name dropping), is because of something that I heard him say over a year ago at a different conference. It was just after he made the decision to leave his church in California. In fact, he spoke to the room of us the day after he and his wife stood before the church to make the announcement.

During his talk to us, he described a moment he had while scuba diving in the Bahamas. Not being an experienced diver, Francis was at the mercy of the guide. Before diving, the guide told him that when they reached a certain depth (I don't recall how many feet) they would be at the point where if they went deeper, they would not have time to return to the surface if there was an equipment failure. Underwater, as they approached that depth, Francis recalls being overcome with anxiety. At first he frantically pointed up to let the guide know that he did not want to go further.

Then he related these thoughts as the guide returned to him and motioned if he was sure he was done - as he was calming himself and praying, he was overcome by this thought from God, what is different if you go further down? Every breath you take is already dependent upon me. What is the difference if the breaths come from a tank or from the air. It doesn't change your dependence.

I have to admit that those words were significant to me and I used them a few months later when getting ready to take a trip aboard a plane. See, I'm not afraid of flying. I rather enjoy it. But, I have enough knowledge of tensile strength of metals to realize that I have something to be afraid of. (That's why ignorance is bliss, because a little knowledge of something doesn't allow you to know why you shouldn't be afraid, just the awareness that you should.)

Anyway, as we were accelerating down the runway, and I was going through my usual visualizations of being in a steel tube, five miles in the air and the wings snapping off, I remembered Francis' words. And believe me, they were soothing. What's the difference? My life is literally in the hands of God regardless as to position. He could snuff me out while standing on solid ground just as easily as He could sustain me in a cylinder traveling 600 miles per hour 5 miles in the sky.

Funny thing is that I put that knowledge away when we landed. It is so easy to remember dependence when you are in an airplane, deep below the surface of the ocean, having surgery, or in some other overtly dangerous situation. But what about in the ordinary, mundane day to day existence?

In combating an addiction we try to gut it out on our own. When trying to resolve marital conflict, we try to apply principles. Raising our kids is done out of our effort. We spend money as we see fit. We breath in and breath out. Our heart beats. Somewhere, in the everyday, the idea of dependence gets lost.

Breathing gets taken for granted. Food in the fridge is always just there. I know that I'm going to get paid every other Friday. My kids are going to always love me. My wife will forgive me and everything will be OK.

What happens when it's not OK? The same God that holds you in His hands five miles in the sky has you in His hands when your marriage is a wreck and you don't know what else to do. That same God who will sustain you a hundred feet underwater will sustain you in your battle again alcohol, pornography, or codependence. He is there in the ordinary things as much as in the spectacular. (To God, it is all ordinary, He made it with His WORDS!)

Where this gets utterly ironic is in our relationship with Him. Seems like we are plenty willing to accept that we need Him to begin the salvation process, but it is up to us to continue it. Sanctification (I know some big words too) is up to us. Salvation is the airplane taking off, where I see clearly my need. Sanctification is the marriage that I try to get right on my own.

(I abhor the saying "pray like everything depends on God, and work like everything depends on you." To me that is just a spiritualized way of justifying our self effort. We should pray and work like everything depends upon God, and our motivation is God's increased glory.)

All of life is dependence. In our relationship with our heavenly maker, our part is openness. Making room for His spirit daily. Moment by moment. Being aware of our dependence, acknowledging our need for God, and letting Him do the rest.

Twitter @Jesus

I enjoy Twitter. Tweeting is fine, I send something out a couple times a week. I pick up about a new Tweep every week. It's fun for news and sports updates. Some people can't have a thought that runs through their head without Tweeting, while others try very hard to show just how profound they can be in just 140 characters. If you look on the front page of my blog you can see my last five Tweets, usually something like "stuck in traffic on I-4" or "enjoying the afternoon with my girls". Pretty routine stuff. Everybody can't enjoy the Twitter lifestyle of Charlie Sheen - #WINNING!

A couple weeks ago a friend from a previous life started following me on Twitter. Got an unexpected email to inform me that "@anonymous is following you on Twitter!" Really, I'm not sure why. In real life outside the Twittersphere, there has been no effort at friendship. Just a seemingly random followship request. Maybe it was an attempt to allay some guilt by clicking a button. In any event, now he is my follower. And the next time we ever talk or email, there will be fodder for the conversation - "Hey there! What's up? I saw that you were stuck in traffic on I-4."

As I have thought about this arrangement more and more, it has occurred to me - isn't that the sort of arrangement that we want with Jesus? We want a Twitter arrangement in which our discipleship costs us nothing more than clicking a button. Now I'm a follower of Jesus, it says so on my Twitter home page. Jesus, Conan O'Brien, Oprah and CNN. I follow them all. While following Jesus in this way makes us feel good, it also allows us to gloss over anything He might have to say as it scrolls by in our Twitterstream. So, as Jesus stands and knocks at the door, it is pretty easy to ignore amidst all the other messages we are seeing. Nothing has to get through, nothing has to change, but I am a follower of Jesus and I am able to move on to the next thing.

Communicating with Twitter Jesus would keep him at a distance, not letting him see the real us. That's safe. What does He expect from 140 characters? So we can give profound one liners about our spiritual life, but remain fundamentally unchanged in our relationship. When life throws a curve, there is a crisis or a need, we can just throw our Tweep Jesus a direct message. "Hey @Jesus, how about a little help with my job situation?" That's prayer. Since Jesus is lost in the stream, we don't have to listen - we've absolved ourselves of that responsibility - and prayer become a one sided thing. Usually a laundry list of what Twitter Jesus needs to do for us so that our lives can be happy and glorious, like we know he intends.

Twitter may allow us to stay connected with others, but it is not a relationship - although that's how it is used. You cannot know me in 140 characters, and likewise I cannot know you. Even worse, when you are one of hundreds of other people I follow, the best you're going to get is a passing glance or maybe a mention. It is control: I can control how much of me you see and I can choose whether or not to notice you. There is no cost in this sort of followship. No investment and very little return. You reap what you sow.

I did that with Jesus and my life turned out to be the house built on sand. Swept away by the storm of life because I had no foundation. Jesus did not know me, despite my works in His name. I wanted to be in control of the nature of my relationship with Jesus. Yet, I've found the opposite to be the spiritual reality. What Jesus desires is an opening so that He can know me. For me to stop what I am doing and listen so He can be in control of my sanctification. To offer spiritual disciplines, not as a way of proving my worth, but rather as a way to allow God to stir the Spirit within me. Discipline without expecting anything in return. Releasing control of my relationship with Jesus to Jesus. He, after all, is the one who chose me.

Even if I did push the "follow" button.

An Open Book

I recently said goodbye to a good friend who is being led by God to the other side of the country. It shouldn't be one of those things that affects our relationship; we have the sort of friendship that you can get together after month's apart and the intimacy is still there. As if it were only a day. His being far away just gives me an excuse to see somewhere new.

His moving is going to bring he and his wife closer to her family, a fact that is going to change the dynamics of the relational system of their marriage. A fact that I pointed out to my friend, along with things he can consider in order to lead his family and prepare for the new situation.

Imagine the irony of me doling out marital advice, and my friend who knows all my mistakes sopping it up eagerly. I don't know why I get surprised, but I am. That God can (well, it's not that He can that surprises, but that He does) continually put me in situations in which my experience has value. He is able to use it, and I can be a blessing to a friend who is yearning to define himself as a man in his marriage.

In the course of our time together, we somehow got on the topic of discipline. Maybe because we are both very similar, and for some reason, while the desire is there, discipline does not come easy to us. This is my year of discipline that flows out of God's love, and my friend is going back to school in order to be forced to study the Bible. That's an expensive way to develop discipline.

There really is a tension to developing spiritual discipline. On the one hand it can be just a routine. The thing you check off on you list in the morning. Pray. Check. Read the Bible. Check. "What's next? Oh, it's Thursday, my google calendar says I need to fast." Check. It becomes such a routine, habitual behavior that the reasons for engaging in it are lost. "Why do you fast? Well, obviously because it's Thursday." There becomes a disconnect. You have a big heaping order of discipline, but hold the spiritual. It's just something you do, like washing your hair. "Lather, rinse, repeat." (By the way, how many of you actually follow those directions and repeat?)

On the other side is the person who practices discipline in order to prove themselves to God and everyone else. Much like the pharisee described by Jesus who thanked God that he fasted twice a week and gave a tenth of everything. That is what made the Pharisee different, and in his own eyes, what made him closer to God than the tax collector. His discipline was his justification.

Be honest, as you read that, you have someone in mind. We have all met that person who when you ask how their week was or how they are doing in their relationship with Jesus, they will regale you with a list of all they have done. For them, spiritual and discipline are expressly linked. And that's how they know God loves them, because they perform enough disciplines. The measurement of success is how long did I pray for, how many chapters did I read in my Bible, how many meals did I miss, and let me count how much time and money I gave. There is always a record for those practicing self justification or works righteousness.

Where then do we land on the spiritual disciplines? Why practice them, if not to prove your righteous worth? What value do they have?

Disciplines provide the opening for God.

When we fast, pray, read, give generously, meditate on scripture, or any of the others, we open ourselves up to the God who saves us. We show that our lives our open to him. He is allowed to come in and continue his work. They serve as a reminder to us that there is a God who is bigger than we are. Disciplines are the opening.

What better way to open yourself to dependence than to fast.

How better to trust than to give generously.

Nothing fosters the reality of a relationship like prayer, reflection, and listening (you do listen, don't you? or do you just implore?)

When scripture is meditated on, it is thoroughly digested and becomes part of who you are.

Disciplines are the opening. More than a routine, they are a connection point to the God who loves us. In an of themselves, they do not make us righteous, but they allow us to remain in the one who is righteous on our behalf. Through our disciplines we open ourselves up to God. Then He can flow out.

I'll miss seeing my friend, I only hope to remember to send him an email.

A Living Sacrifice

In the car a couple days ago I was rerunning a random conversation from the past and thinking how different my reply would be now. The situation that elicited the discussion was about a friend who was a talented actress. She was cast in a play in which the costumes were racy, the dialogue not edifying, and the after hours activities of the cast were very much worldly.

Within our conversation, I asked why she took the role, with as many spiritual concessions she was having to make. In essence, her reply was that God gave her this gift of acting (which I do not doubt in the least), and that if she was going to use it these were the types of boundaries that she was going to have to cross. The response that I would change had something to do with her trying to be a light in the darkness.

When Paul writes that we should be living sacrifices, we seem to apply that to things we have some semblance of control over. I'm going to not see 'R' rated movies - sacrifice, I'll tithe - sacrifice, every week I will go to church - sacrifice, maybe if I am feeling super spiritual, I will fast - sacrifice. You tracking with me? But what if our living sacrifice had more to do with us?

Maybe my advice to my friend should have been something like - if you believe that God gave you this gift, maybe He is asking for you to offer it back as an act of worship for his glory. The lack of godliness in the roles you are pursuing may be something God is trying to use to draw you closer to him and being satisfied in his love alone, rather than being satisfied using the gift. Maybe, just maybe that is the thing that you are to lay on the altar our of your love for Christ.

A living sacrifice.

How would she have responded? I can guess. That is a totally skewed view compared with most things I've read and heard over the years. But it seems to fit.

Ever think about the gifted communicator that is jailed for his convictions? John Bunyan comes to mind. Why did God allow him to be there when so many people could benefit from his eloquence, which by the way was his gift in Bunyan's life. I think it is probable that God love John enough that He wanted John to lay his gift on the altar as living sacrifice. God gave the gift and for a season Bunyan got to give it back as an act of worship. He could have lied to get out and continue preaching, God could have sent an angel to unlock his chains and walk him out the front door, but instead God was most pleased to have Bunyan lay his gift on the altar.

A living sacrifice.

It is God we are to delight in, not anything else, including using the gifts He's given us.

Maybe this is why God allows women who are designed to bear children to be frustrated; people who are designed for intimacy not to be able to attain it; those who save and save not to be able to get ahead; people to be held back in using the special gifts.

We are to be living sacrifices, please to God in Christ despite our performance, and He wants us to delight in him just because "I AM". Independent of what we get from him and independent of our circumstances.

Let's experience his rest and become the living sacrifices He desires.

Jesus is the Blessing

There is a trap that it is very easy for Christians to fall into. It is really so subtle that it is almost universally pronounced and few try to claw their way out of it. It is the contention that Christianity is supposed to have benefits for this life. We call them blessings.

When you become a Christian, you life will become peaceful. Or we challenge people to obediently tithe in order to receive a material blessing. Follow Christian principles to have a blessed marriage. Raise your children in the way they should go and they will turn out the way you want. On and on an on we could go.

Problem is, that is not what Jesus promised. Nor it is the experience of almost every Christian who has lived. The stones hit Stephen. Peter and Paul were martyred. John lived a hard life imprisoned on an island. Life is hard. This world, in almost every facet, rebels against the Christ follower's presence here. Sure, some Christians do experience rich material and emotional blessings, but those are the exceptions - God's choice - but not intended to be held up as the rule of our lives.

If you've been discouraged in your life with Christ, maybe it is because you are holding onto some expectations that by following God, you are supposed to have some benefit that sets you apart.

I've recounted in early blog posts this line of thinking describes my expectations of God before my affair. If I was good enough, God will make everything right. And give me what I want. While the things I wanted were "spiritual", they were as unhealthy as if I expected a million dollars to fall from the sky. That was an exhausting way to think. No blessing? Things not working out? Try harder.

Today I had the most amazing realization. The latest mile marker on my journey of trust and strength. My heart has been leaping with delight all day. I've been inching along toward this for awhile and I know I'll still battle this after declaring it, but lots of pieces fell into place today.

Jesus IS the blessing. Not any potential interventions God can make in your life. Not financial security. Not a harmonious marriage. Not a fulfilling job. Not healthy kids. Not, not, not, not.... Those are not THE blessing we are promised, Jesus is.

Jesus says of himself that he is the way, the truth and the life. Get that?

Jesus is our life. Not Jesus plus something else. Just Jesus. Jesus is the blessing. He is my identity. Everything must flow from my identity in Christ. He is the living water that flows forth from within me.

Tomorrow I am going with my 10 year old daughter to St. Augustine. A city that was founding by a guy looking for the fountain of youth. A flow of water that would give eternal youth. Good ole Ponce looked everywhere outside himself for this fountain. He should have looked inward. Jesus is the fountain. Jesus is the blessing.

I told my wife today, with all seriousness, that because of her I am the luckiest man in the world. God loved me enough to give her to me. Without our relationship, I would have had a harder road having my heart transformed to know Jesus is my blessing. From that I also know that I am called to show her how loved she is in order to understand God's love for her. I am to lovingly serve her and be a blessing as Christ is to me. Yes, that's written in Ephesians, but it is now more than words, it has meaning beyond what is written.

Another example, you can't start with the product, you have to start with the identity.

Jesus is the blessing. Amen.

Basic Instinct

I'm not sure if this is one of those myths that roll around and you eventually believe or if it is based on truth, but as some point I remember learning or being told that humans are born with two basic instincts. The first is the instinct to suckle.

As I type this a memory comes rushing forth. Not sure how this evolved, and as a parent I don't think I'd admit this on anything with my name attached. When my daughter was just an infant, there were three things that would make her cry. So when she would get rolling we had the checklist. Dirty diaper? Tired? Hungry? Now, since I could not feed my daughter (only mom had the physical assets to accomplish that), I developed a check. I'd bend my head down to her and put the tip of my nose within reach of her mouth. If she latched on, that was proof positive she was hungry. There's the suckle instinct. Gross. Dad needs a lesson in hygiene.

The second instinct is to grasp. Like when you fall, your instinct is to grab for something, without thinking. I think that this instinct has a definite spiritual component as well. For the past month, I've been out of the desert. Really enjoying my new role, new community, new challenges, etc. But, I have noticed a tendency to grasp.

While in the desert, one of the greatest learnings I had was how to hold things with open hands. In particular, my calling was an example of this. Without a doubt, I knew that God wanted me back in vocational ministry. He designed me for it and compelled me to it. The calling was clear and evident to me, and I'd even say to those close to me. Yet, even while compelled, I was able to hold this loosely. Not striving and refraining from pushing my way forward when nothing was evident. Yet, at the same time, I was able to accept modest opportunities when they presented. While I was thankful for the opportunities to speak, I held back from overstepping the opportunity.

That's holding things with open hands. Following God's lead, but not running out in front. Not grasping on to the old ways. I did the same in other areas: my marital expectations, developing relationships, and spirituality to give a few examples.

Lately, though, I've noticed the temptation to clench my spiritual hands together and grab on tightly begin to creep in. Clinging to the old. It is the same old battle with my pride. It is so important to deny myself daily.

Today was a particularly acute day. All day I clung to my fear of inadequacy. Afraid that I would not measure up. Pride plain and simple. In the midst of changes and challenges, it became so easy to reach out and cling to the old and familiar. Believing the lie. It was almost instinctual. Yet I know it's not, it is just my root sin. My evil pal.

There are also some dreams that I've been clinging to, again that involve my pride. Going back to the false lens that evaluates people's worth by what they can do for me. For me, this is the latest episode in my Paschal Mystery that God has put before me. Releasing some of my old expectations and desires that I have, particularly in my marriage, so that God can bless me with the new. In this case, the old is so much easier to cling to because the new is not my vision or even necessarily what will make me happiest in a worldly kind of way. Yet God knows best. And releasing these dreams is my latest act of trust. Or rather, will be when I am able to honestly say that I've let them go.

Tonight in the car, I yelled at God. For about ten minutes. Just let Him have it. I cling to my anger. Great counsel has been given to me that I must learn to do something with my anger, I just struggle to know what that is. God is involved in the process somehow. If I cling to it and hold it in, that is just more pride (for me, it's really all about pride). Pride in acting as if I can solve the problem myself. If I just act like it's not there, it will go away. Won't it? Denying my need for God.

So I yelled. And cried, although that doesn't seem very manly to admit (doooohhh, more pride). That's a step of trust that God is going to love me anyway. That He'll be able to accept how I'm really feeling and won't abandon me. It actually let to a good evening of prayer alone in my study. Pretty sure yelling isn't the long term solution, but neither is holding onto the anger with a tight fist.

Pride clouded the lens. But I am choosing the Gospel lens. Believing that God loves me and wants to bear my burdens (anger) with me and He'll never leave me nor forsake me - even when I would not judge my performance to be adequate.

I am choosing to trust that His plans for me are so much better than the plans that I have for myself. So, letting go of my dreams, expectations and vision of what would fulfill me becomes possible only with the Gospel lens. Otherwise I would continue to be consumed trying to fill my only perceived areas of lack.

As far as my fear, I have to trust that the works of service that God has called me to were prepared by God in advance. Not as a test to determine my worth, but as an opportunity He created for me to worship with my life. I am already fully secure with Him, regardless of my performance.

The Gospel lens beats the basic instinct.

Back to The Cave

The lens presents us with a choice. We can either live in light of the truth, the gospel lens, that says that God has already solved our biggest problem or we can believe the lie and remain trapped by our false identity, constantly serving it to keep it satisfied. This choice is just like the one presented in The Cave.

If you recall, the view of reality for those held prisoner in the cave was just a shadow of a made up world. Each person's identity was a cave dweller, sitting and watching the shadows. Yet, when the chains were released, there is a choice and a new identity can be created. The person can leave the cave and experience the wonder and beauty of things unknown. This new world that was created for them was there all along, they just needed to make the steps to enter in.

Freedom is the gospel lens. Entering the light is part of the lens of Jesus. In it there is a light burden and there is no enslavement.

Yet, what if someone chose to remain in the cave? This is entirely possible. We see it all the time. Even being a prisoner is comfortable. It is known. There is no risk, no change, no possible pain. It is easy to simply sit back down and watch the shadows.

The Israelites did this as they trudged through the desert. Shouting down Moses, demanding to turn around because at least in Egypt they had meat in their pot. It is well documented that prisoners get comfortable being institutionalized. Experiencing the expanse of the world, being force to make decisions on the outside become difficult and painful. So much easier to embrace the shadows.

But to believe the lie, to cling to the false identity, is to miss freedom. To continue looking through the dirty lens means that our energy will continually be expended placating and satisfying the false self. And the demands of the false self grow and grow and grow, and we struggle more and more and more to meet them in an exhausting cycle that brings less and less satisfaction.

Look at the twelve step program. In its essence, these programs do a wonderful job. The intent of a program like Alcoholics Anonymous is to identify alcoholism and call it what it is for the purpose of changing the lens. When you read through the twelve steps, the only one that mentions alcohol is number 1. The rest of the steps highlight the process of shedding the old identity and substituting it with another based on God.

Where this process fails is when the person involved misses the point and instead clings to the identity of alcoholic. Believing the lie that their struggle defines them, trapped in the cave of shame and sorrow rather than experiencing true freedom.

You and I, as followers of Christ, are free of the lie. We have the ability to walk out of the cave and become what God intended us. Experiencing His love and letting it renew and strengthen us daily. As the Paschal Mystery describes, though, we cannot be blessed by the new if we are still clinging to the old - if we refuse to walk up the steps, refusing to look through the gospel lens.

Making the Adjustment

In the often used sermon example, we are told that experts in identifying counterfeit bills are trained not by looking at forgeries, but rather in becoming so familiar with the real thing that imperfections are obvious.

The same is true with our identities in Christ. When we walk with Him, we have our new identity, yet we need to be so familiar with the gospel lens that we are not fooled by substitutes. Even subtle ones. Most subtle is when we are entice to do things to make ourselves presentable to God. Climbing the ladder of religion. It is subtle because it looks so Good. But it is deceiving because in reality, our identity become based on what we are doing. Trying to earn our way to God.

True identity is not a product of the things we do for God, but rather the things we do for God are a product of our true identity.

But it is not just enough to clean the lens and be familiar with what the Bible says about who we are in Christ. When I wandered away and was enslaved by my false self, like the prodigal son finding himself lying hungry in a pig pen, something I did early on was confront my identity issues. From that came my identity statement in Christ. A good start, a worthy first step, but not worth much if that's where the journey ends. My journey paused there while my true identity in Christ had an epic battle with my false one created by my root sin of pride. I was up against my Wall.

We have to make the adjustment by looking at ourselves through the gospel lens. Like the red lens I would get in a box of Cracker Jacks when I was a kid. Turn the lens on a piece of paper with a bunch of red dots and it reveals a message or picture underneath. There the entire time, you just have to cut through the clutter with the proper lens.

When we take the time to examine ourselves through the gospel lens, cutting through the clutter, we can see that our behaviors are the way we feed our false self. Providing a temporary comfort. Placating the things within that we don't want to confront.

For me, the gospel lens revealed my pride. It would never be enough to try to 'stop' being a people pleaser, to 'stop' seeking affirmation at work, or to 'stop' being passive in an effort to make my wife happy. Overcoming those things with more Bible study and prayer, while good intentioned, would have been another attempt to 'do' for God. I couldn't stop these behaviors anymore that I could stop myself from sweating in the sun - that is until I looked at myself through the gospel lens and understood that all these behaviors were just an effort to satisfy the false self created by my pride.

At the moment of my Miracle, God told me the problem was my sin. That's been true on a much deeper level than my prodigal behavior, and it took that first step of cleaning my lens by developing and understanding my identity in Christ. But I had to use that lens to make the adjustment to live out of my true, God-given identity in Christ. Shining the pure light of Christ on my soul, revealing by his true humility how pervasive my pride was.

Cleaning the Lens

Our behavior is related to our identity, and our identity is a product of the lens that we are using to examine ourselves. In the last blog, I introduced us to the three main lenses that create in us a false identity. Seeking to define who we are based on what we have, the things we do, or what people are thinking about us.

So often in my life in Christ, I've gotten trapped in battling behaviors. Fighting the losing battle to make myself look better. Perilously close to becoming a white washed tomb. But to really overcome, to really take part in the life of Christ and his suffering, our identity must be in Him. That is a process that first requires cleaning the lens, looking at ourselves through the gospel lens or the lens of Christ.

One of the most common examples I have from my experience in ministry and the academic world is from the life of single people. Many singles find their identity in singleness. Said another way, their identity begins to be defined by what they do not have, a spouse. So now their actions are based on this perceived hole in their identity. This makes it easier to compromise beliefs or put themselves in harmful situations and relationships. All in the name of being complete (remember Jerry Maguire?). Filling the perceived lack.

If not what I have, the things I do, or what people think of me, then what?

Here is the gospel lens; statements God makes about our identity. This list was given to me, so if I missed any, don't hesitate to let me know.

1. I have been healed. (Isaiah 53:5)
2. I am the salt of the earth. (Matthew 5:13)
3. I am the light of the world. (Matthew 5:14)
4. I am commissioned to make disciples. (Matthew 28:19, 20)
5. I am a child of God. (John 1:12)
6. I have eternal life. (John 10:27)
7. I have been given peace. (John 14:27)
8. I am part of the true vine, a channel of Christ’s life. (John 15:1, 5)
9. I am clean. (John 15:3)
10. I am Christ’s friend. (John 15:15)
11. I am chosen and appointed by Christ to bear His fruit. (John 15:16)
12. I have been given glory. (John 17:22)
13. I have been justified…completely forgiven and made righteous. (Romans 5:1)
14. I died with Christ and died to the power of sin’s rule over my life. (Romans 6:1 – 6)
15. I am a slave of righteousness. (Romans 6:18)
16. I am free from sin and enslaved to God. (Romans 6:22)
17. I am free forever from condemnation. (Romans 8:1)
18. I am a son of God; God is spiritually my Father. (Romans 8:14, 15; Galatians 3:26; 4:6)
19. I am a joint heir with Christ, sharing his inheritance with Him. (Romans 8:17)
20. I am more than a conqueror through Christ, Who loves me. (Romans 8:37)
21. I have faith. (Romans 12:3)
22. I have been sanctified and called to holiness. (1 Corinthians 1:2)
23. I have been given grace in Christ Jesus. (1 Corinthians 1:4)
24. I have been placed into Christ by God’s doing. (1 Corinthians 1:30)
25. I have received the Spirit of God into my life that I might know the things freely given to me by God. (1 Corinthians 2:12)
26. I have been given the mind of Christ. (1 Corinthians 2:16)
27. I am a temple…a dwelling place…of God. His Spirit and His life dwells in me. (1 Corinthians 3:16; 6:19)
28. I am united to the Lord and am one spirit with Him. (1 Corinthians 6:17)
29. I have been bought with a price; I am not my own; I belong to God. (1 Corinthians 6:19, 20; 7:23)
30. I am called. (1 Corinthians 7:17)
31. I am a member of Christ’s Body. (1 Corinthians 12:27; Ephesians 5:30)
32. I am victorious through Jesus Christ. (1 Corinthians 15:57)
33. I have been established, anointed and sealed by God in Christ, and I have been given the Holy Spirit as a pledge guaranteeing my inheritance to come. (2 Corinthians 1:21; Ephesians 1:13, 14)
34. I am led by God in triumphal procession. (2 Corinthians 2:14)
35. I am to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. (2 Corinthians 2:15)
36. I am being changed into the likeness of Christ. (2 Corinthians 3:18)
37. Since I have died, I no longer live for myself, but for Christ. (2 Corinthians 5:14, 15)
38. I am a new creation. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
39. I am reconciled to God and am a minister of reconciliation. (2 Corinthians 5:18, 19)
40. I have been made righteous. (2 Corinthians 5:21)
41. I am given strength in exchange for weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:10)
42. I have been crucified with Christ and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. The life I am now living is Christ’s life. (Galatians 2:20)
43. I am a son of God and one in Christ. (Galatians 3:26, 28)
44. I am Abraham’s seed…an heir of the promise. (Galatians 3:29)
45. I am an heir of God since I am a son of God. (Galatians 4:6, 7)
46. I am a saint. (Ephesians 1:1, 1 Corinthians 1:2, Philippians 1:1, Colossians 1:2)
47. I have been blessed with every spiritual blessing. (Ephesians 1:3)
48. I was chosen in Christ before the foundation of the world to be holy and without blame before Him. (Ephesians 1:4)
49. I was predestined…determined by God…to be adopted as God’s son. (Ephesians 1:5)
50. I have been sealed with the Holy Spirit. (Ephesians 1:13)
51. I have been redeemed and forgiven, and I am a recipient of His lavish grace.
52. I have been made alive together with Christ. (Ephesians 2:5)
53. I have been raised up and seated with Christ in heaven. (Ephesians 2:6)
54. I am God’s workmanship…His handiwork…born anew in Christ to do His work. (Ephesians 2:10)
55. I have direct access to God through the Spirit. (Ephesians 2:18)
56. I am a fellow citizen with the rest of God’s family. (Ephesians 2:19)
57. I may approach God with boldness, freedom, and confidence. (Ephesians 3:12)
58. I am righteous and holy. (Ephesians 4:24)
59. I am a citizen of heaven, seated in heaven right now. (Philippians 3:20; Ephesians 2:6)
60. I am capable. (Philippians 4:13)
61. I have been rescued from the domain of Satan’s rule and transferred to the kingdom of Christ. (Colossians 1:13)
62. I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins. The debt against me has been cancelled. (Colossians 1:14)
63. I am blameless and free from accusation. (Colossians 1:22)
64. Christ Himself is in me. (Colossians 1:27)
65. I am firmly rooted in Christ and am now being built up in Him. (Colossians 2:7)
66. I have been made complete in Christ. (Colossians 2:10)
67. I have been spiritually circumcised. My old unregenerate nature has been removed. (Colossians 2:11)
68. I have been buried, raised, and made alive with Christ. (Colossians 2:12, 13)
69. I died with Christ and I have been raised up with Christ. My life is now hidden with Christ in God. Christ is now my life. (Colossians 3:1 – 4)
70. I am an expression of the life of Christ because He is my life. (Colossians 3:4)
71. I am chosen of God, holy and dearly loved. (Colossians 3:12, 1 Thessalonians 1:4)
72. I am a son of light and not of darkness. (1 Thessalonians 5:5)
73. I have been given a spirit of power, love, and self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)
74. I have been saved and set apart according to God’s doing. (2 Timothy 1:9; Titus 3:5)
75. Because I am sanctified and am one with the Sanctifier, He is not ashamed to call me brother. (Hebrews 2:11)
76. I am a holy partaker of a heavenly calling. (Hebrews 3:1)
77. I am a partaker of Christ; I share in His life. (Hebrews 3:14)
78. I have the right to come boldly before the throne of God to find mercy and grace in time of need. (Hebrews 4:16)
79. I have been born again. (1 Peter 1:23)
80. I am one of God’s living stones, being built up in Christ as a spiritual house. (1 Peter 2:5)
81. I am a member of a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God’s own possession. (1 Peter 2:9, 10)
82. I am an alien and stranger to this world in which I temporarily live. (1 Peter 2:11)
83. I am an enemy of the devil. (1 Peter 5:8)
84. I have been given exceedingly great and precious promises by God by which I am a partaker of God’s divine nature. (2 Peter 1:4)
85. I am forgiven on the account of Jesus’s name. (1 John 2:12)
86. I am anointed by God. (1 John 2:27)
87. I am a child of god and I will resemble Christ when He returns. (1 John 3:1, 2)
88. I am loved. (1 John 4:10)
89. I am like Christ. (1 John 4:17)
90. I have life. (1 John 5:12)
91. I am born of God, and the evil one…the devil…cannot touch me. (1 John 5:18)
92. I have been redeemed. (Revelation 5:9)

A Blurred View

Many years ago, when the Hubble Space telescope was lifted into space, amid all the hoopla of it being a technological marvel, one of the largest satellites to that date, and having the ability to see further into space than an optical telescope had ever seen, there arose one small problem. When they flipped the switch into the 'ON' position, it was blurry.

The image was blurry. And distorted. Not at all a true representation of what lay out there, further than we had ever seen before. It turns out that when the lens fabricated, the curvature was miscalculated. By less than 1%. (Expensive mistake.) The view into space was compromised because of a problem with the lens.

Our spiritual lives, too, can be compromised by the lens we use to view ourselves. (Yes, a cheesy intro, but I needed something to warm up.) In my experience, people (including myself) have three main lens defects. We view ourselves through the lens of what we do, the lens of what we have, and the lens of what people think us. That's how we tend to generate our identity, by using defective lenses.

When Satan tempted Jesus, he tempted the identity of the Son of God. "Jesus, your identity is in what you do, turn these stones into bread", "Jesus, your identity is in what you have, call down angels from heaven", and finally "Jesus, your identity is is what people think of you, they will worship you if you just bow before me." Jesus knew who He was, and what God intended Him to be. His identity was secure because His lens never faltered.

The Hubble telescope was eventually fixed by correcting the error in the lens. It took a lot of looking at the data to see where the error was, and then more effort to make the proper adjustments. Just like the Hubble, our lenses may need adjustment. Maybe as we evaluate our lives, make resolutions, and try to be better, it is possible we are attacking the wrong problem. Rather than worry about the uncomfortable behaviors that are the fruit of our identity first, we may need to examine the lens that we get that identity from.

And make adjustments. So that we can see clearly to fix the real problem.